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I have a good, relatively easy life. Many of my challenges have been self-inflicted. Many are only challenges because of my softness. However, I do not let that get in the way of my whining and feelings of entitlement.
Despite my self infatuation, there are two moments, almost 30 years apart, which have been seared into me. They are etched like tattoos into my being. When my inner brat starts a hostile takeover, they can anchor me.
Around 12, I volunteered at an event for underprivileged children. Love for Kids is a charity that provides a Christmas experience for children who might not have the same celebration I was accustomed to. They held it on a massive ranch. There were rides, carnival games, gifts, and celebrity guests. One year, they assigned me to work at a concession stand. The entire event was free, so we were just filling orders of drinks and candy. While we didn’t charge for the items, we were supposed to portion it out so everyone could enjoy the treats.
Inside a concession stand trailer is humid, sticky, and often smelly. We had a constant line of guests, so the work seemed never-ending. It didn’t take long for 12-year-old me to forget my purpose. One young boy was just staring at me instead of giving me his drink order. I don’t remember what I said, but it was likely said too sharply. He responded, “I don’t know. I have never had a soda before.”
Thirty years later, slightly less obnoxious but still forgetful of how easy my life has been, I volunteered at a place that filled grocery needs for individuals with food insecurity. The experience deeply touched me, but my mind had turned to my feet. They were sore from all the standing and squatting that day. A very kind guest came to my station, and her face cycled through surprise, excitement, and then a tear-filled joy. She said, “Is that butter? Oh my, I haven’t had butter in… in… in so long I can’t remember.”
It is very easy to get wrapped up in my own experience. When I am focused on myself, I often forget the scale of my concerns. Sometimes, I see what I don’t have and lose sight of what I do have to share.
Do I fully appreciate what I do have? Will I use my standing to help lift others? Can I help shoulder your load?
Be curious, be kind, be whole, do good things.
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